Nirjonmela Desi Forum
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Today, my 808 area code phone number has yet again been mistaken for a 1-800 number. I’ve been getting phone calls at three in the morning from people on the East Coast trying to return their shoes. Even worse, they end up wanting to speak to my supervisor because I “don’t sound professional enough.”
Working for a news organization is a tough job, as these world-weary tweets suggest: • News reporter: “The computer erased all the apostrophes in my story. Apparently I’m too possessive.” • Copy editor, as group of Cub Scouts gets a tour: “There it is, ‘Scared Straight: Newsroom Edition.’” • Producer: “Free food in the
newsroom is like oxygen masks on an airplane. You get yours first, then
you inform others.”
The late comedian Mitch
Hedberg said that he would write jokes by sitting around his hotel room thinking of things that cracked him up. “Then I go get a pen, and
I write it down,” he said. “Or, if the pen’s too far away, I convince myself that what I thought of ain’t funny.”
Journalists and editors on deadline make the occasional error. Some are funnier than others: • NBC reported that American students rank internationally at: “26th math, 21th science, 17th reading.” • Britain’s Sky News showed the
importance of punctuation: “Top
stories: World leaders at Mandela tribute, Obama–Castro handshake and same-sex marriage date set.” • A retraction from Wired: “A previous version of this story incorrectly quoted Dropbox cofounder Drew Houston saying ‘anyone with nipples’ instead of ‘anyone with a pulse.’”
Recently, a man stopped at my desk at the library asking for help:
A woman had breast-fed her infant and forgotten to “tuck herself back in.” I walked over to Lady Godiva and said, “Ma’am, I’m very sorry, but we don’t allow open drink containers
Journalists and editors on deadline make the occasional error. Some are funnier than others: • NBC reported that American students rank internationally at: “26th math, 21th science, 17th reading.” • Britain’s Sky News showed the
importance of punctuation: “Top
stories: World leaders at Mandela tribute, Obama–Castro handshake and same-sex marriage date set.” • A retraction from Wired: “A previous version of this story incorrectly quoted Dropbox cofounder Drew Houston saying ‘anyone with nipples’ instead of ‘anyone with a pulse.’”
Were Moses alive today, the Ten Commandments would be known as the Ten Best Practices, presented in PowerPoint and followed by 40 years of status meetings. • The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world
that he didn’t invent PowerPoint. • No one ever says, “Boy, that ‘I Have a Dream’ speech could’ve been a lot better if Martin Luther King Jr. had used PowerPoint.
